(by Deb Porter-Jones)
BLASTS FROM THE PAST!!
New York invites the ex-girlfriends of the final 6: The Entertainer, Tailor Made, Pretty, Buddha, Punk, and Mr. Wise. Only, all of the guys don’t have girlfriends that come – Buddha and Pretty have their SISTERS show instead! (Red flags, anyone?)
New York separates the guys from their exes (or sisters) and interrogates the ladies with the help of Mom, Sister Patterson. Meanwhile, the guys are then taken into another interrogation room and questioned by no less than CHANCE and REAL!! These are two of the final few contestants from last season, when New York chose Tango (you remember, the guy who looked like Michealangelo from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles). Chance and Real (mostly Chance) pull NO punches and break these guys down to the nitty-gritty. Here’s a breakdown:
Tailor Made:
This guy’s just a nervous wreck regardless. Everyone intimidates Tailor Made: Buddha, New York, most assuredly Sister Patterson. For someone who’s supposed to be an accomplished and well-paid businessman, he doesn’t seem to be cool under fire at all. He’s been shaking like a leaf ever since Buddha head-butted him and made him see lightning a few weeks ago. Chance and Real both appear to see right through him and have him pegged for a ladies man who’s probably missing a screw. Tailor Made’s convinced that they both hate him (the guy’s got some self esteem issues, too).
While he’s being interrogated by Chance and Real, Tailor Made’s WIFE is being grilled by our girl NY and Sister Patterson. Tailor Made’s wife is not the most attractive, which is kind of surprising – if he likes to wear and experience the finer things in life, wouldn’t that extend to the girl on his arm as well? The wife is a little on the frumpy side, kinda plain, wouldn’t look twice if you passed her on the street.
She seems nice enough, but Tailor Made’s wife is definitely out to unload this guy – she almost begged New York to take him (“No, no, he’s available, we’re practically divorced. You’ll love him, he’s a great guy. Now where can I send his stuff?”). Yeah, she needs him to move on with his life, but quick.
Mr. Wise:
Mr. Wise’s girlfriend comes to dish on him to New York. There is a private conversation between the two of them while they’re waiting to be interrogated. Girlfriend hints that once New York gets a load of what he’s packing, it’s a wrap; show’s over. Thank goodness he was mature enough to keep that information to himself, unlike like Wolf, who knew he had absolutely nothing else to offer New York but his skills in the bedroom, or rather his equipment. Wise’s girlfriend is clearly still a girl in love who doesn’t appear to be “over” him.
Wise is interrogated by Chance and Real.
Apparently, Wise was “less than truthful” about his most recent contact with his ex, Kia. It’s obvious to both Chance and Real AND New York and Sister Patterson that these two still have feelings for each other. Also, it is discovered that they either spoke or saw each other a mere two weeks before Wise went to the house. A little suspicious, but NY thinks that Wise kept this information to himself because he still has feelings for Kia. Kia is obviously hurting because Wise has moved on, and we suspect that he has some feeling for her, too.
The Entertainer:
Chance and Real have a field day with The Entertainer! He’s kinda scary-looking (think Jack Nicholson from The Shining. Hope New York doesn’t go on a ski trip with him or anything. We may never see her again). Oh, and get this. Did you think The Entertainer was actually in the entertainment business? I thought maybe a magician – alright actually I was sure he WAS an entertainer – of the adult variety. But, Chance and Real grill Entertainer real good and get him to admit that he is actually a UPS delivery driver. Huh? (Maybe he delivers strip-o-grams in his uniform after hours – there’s gotta be some money in that).
Meanwhile, the Entertainer’s ex is spilling the beans on him and why they broke up in the first place. Try as she might, she just couldn’t develop an appreciation for a guy who lives in his parents’ basement.
Plus, he has (had?) anger issues, which just reinforces Sister Patterson’s belief from day one that Entertainer was psycho and “bottom of the barrel nasty”.
Punk:
Doesn’t it always seem like Punk is a little TOO self-conscious? Like he’s secretly trying to check himself out in the camera lens. Punk’s ex-girlfriend shows up to offer her assessment of him – but she really seems to be so NOT over him.
On several occasions, it looked as though she was doing her best to hold back tears and beg New York to throw him back. She looks like she puts in work at the gym, too. He probably threw her back because she wanted to work out in front of the mirror and was blocking his view – of himself!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch – Punk does not like being interrogated by a guy that New York clearly had strong feelings for. He can tolerate Real, but Chance definitely rubs him the wrong way. There is a bit of an altercation, and Punk turns over the table in the interrogation room (he’s so sexy when he’s angry, well, I think he’s angry. Somehow this guy can exhibit anger without looking too menacing. I don’t know he got the name Punk; he’s definitely the Pretty one). Punk feels disrespected
Buddha:
Buddha’s sister agrees that he definitely has a problem controlling his emotions, and apparently indicates to Sister Patterson and New York that he is potentially violent. Meanwhile, Buddha is having a lovely conversation with Chance and Real that fails to reveal any ground-breaking information. Surprising, because New York was initially suspicious of the fact that Buddha and Pretty could not produce an ex-girlfriend.
Pretty:
Pretty’s sister is questioned by New York and Sister Patterson regarding his sex life (has she walked in on home performing the act, has she seen him alone performing an act) questions that his sister is clearly not comfortable answering. The bombshell? Sis states that she has never met any of Pretty’s ex-girlfriends. It was bad enough that Pretty submitted his Sister rather than an ex-girlfriend.
At the same time, Pretty was being questioned by Chance and Real, and he totally contradicted what his sister said regarding his girlfriends meeting his sis and mom. He says that his sister and mom are very close to him and he ALWAYS takes them home. How many, you ask? Oh, more than ten girlfriends have met his mom and sis.
Well, I guess you know it’s on now!
After the guys’ interrogations, Chance and Real take New York out for dinner where they can compare notes. Chance and New York spend some time fussing and smooching (wait, wasn’t he last season, why is New York getting caught up with him?). At dinner, they manage to discover that there are some problems involving the truth for Wise and Pretty.
Back at the mixer with the exes and the guys, Sister Patterson makes an issue out of Chance kissing on New York and clearly expresses her disappointment. Buddha is also upset, so he calls Punk over to confront Chance and Real.
Chance first backpedals (I’m sure he wants no parts of Buddha and Punk, with his little self). Then, it’s vintage Chance. Punk says he’s like a little Chihuahua, lot of bark but no bite. That’s so true. He throws his drink and he and his brother jump in the car and speed off!
This chain of events really upsets New York – it seems like she didn’t want Chance to leave. She’s already heated and confronts Wise on his failure to let her know that he saw his ex two weeks before he came to “her” house. Wise decides to discuss the situation when she’s less upset.
New York then confronts Pretty about his out-and-out lie regarding bringing his girlfriends home to meet Mom and Sis. Pretty is clearly wanting a confrontation – he had previously discussed the possibility of one with Buddha and Punk because he thought his sister was upset about the conversation with New York. Originally, Buddha and Punk said that they had his back.
Well, at the mixer New York becomes heated because Pretty doesn’t want to discuss his lie about the girlfriends. He walks off after dropping a couple F bombs to New York and throwing a glass (a little femininely, too, I might add). This really upsets New York and she comes after him “to talk to him”. He wants no parts of her. I think he was just trying to get out of there before someone calls him out. Maybe the rumors about Pretty have some merit, maybe he’s on the Down Low. If so, it probably wasn’t the smartest thing to get on a popular, national reality show if you have a lot of secrets.
The show ends with New York apologizing to the remaining guys for her behavior with Chance and she asks the guys to give her another chance. Buddha is clearly not impressed early on, but then decides that she is sincere. We’ll see next episode!
